A Tale of Two Black Fridays

I never shop on Black Friday! Well, that is to say I never wake up early to shop on Black Friday and y'all are nuts who do! Craziness. I like a good deal, but I like sleep even better. And all the makeupless raging estrogen, bumper car-ing their carts through the store, powered by several triple espressos and semi-maxed credit cards, all grasping for the item I am looking at does nothing to inspire me to go! Scary.

I digress.

Black Friday Tale #1
This Black Friday we slept in (a miracle in this house) and went to Target well after the initial rush was over and then met up with some friends at the MAX to head downtown for the annual tree lighting ceremony. We got there just as it was starting which meant that we were able to hear only the top-most notes of Aaron Meyer's violin and we could see about the top half of the tree. Still fun. Afterward we had the totally unique idea of rushing into the mall's food court to grab some dinner... with the other 2,000 people who had the same unique idea. We hovered like vultures around those eating waiting for our opportunity to swoop down and snatch up their table and then snarled viciously at anyone who tried to steal chairs. Our group ended up separating and going home alone. We were lucky enough to catch a MAX with two nice men who played pick-a-boo, hide and seek, and too-slow-Joe, with Sterling. The conductor even opened his door to peek out and say "Hi" to Sterling and Evie (which Doug has never seen in his 9 years of MAX commuting)! Evie's diaper leaked on Doug (as it turns out later, it wasn't just #1, either) and I'm pretty sure we all got sick from germs on the train. And, to top it off, as we were walking home we saw a coyote cross our path, so we had to walk the other way. Anyway, I've decided we need to take public trans. into the city more often since such exciting things never happen when you drive around in Suburbia!

Black Friday Tale #2
This is a story about Roux (pronounced Roo).

He is, or was, the spawn of Satan in feline form. This cat would literally stalk you down a dark corridor and then leap at the opportune moment exposing all of his claws and baring his teeth. He would hide around corners and jump out batting your legs as you shriek and kick and run. He batted all of our round ornaments off the tree and down the stairs when we left for vacation during Christmas. He shredded toilet paper off the rolls, killed field mice, and could never keep a collar on. He was also the biggest brawler in the neighborhood and consistently came home with wounds that required a vet to insert a drain to relieve the abscesses. He often went next door like it was his own home and several times frightened our neighbor lady very badly by jumping onto her bed in the middle of the night. He slept in our bathroom sink, and more than once crouched on the retaining wall in the front yard only to pounce out at a couple of ladies and their Great Dane. Not afraid!

On a particular Black Friday 5 years ago, Michelle and I went Black Friday shopping to World Market where I got this cute kitty stocking for the very bad kitty.

Only to discover upon coming home that the very bad kitty could still not be found. We hadn't seen him since Thanksgiving in fact. Doug had asked at our neighbor lady's and she hadn't seen him since he was prowling around her house the day before. We were at a loss and expecting the worst. It just so happened that Doug remembered seeing that the neighbor lady had ordered furniture and it was delivered the day before, so he called the furniture store. Fortunately they were only a few miles away and claimed they had a small, furry stowaway who was currently living in the back of their truck eating leftover turkey. As we drove up, Roux immediately started mewing at the familiar sound of our truck and was very loving (on this particular occasion) at being reclaimed.
I think it goes without saying that he got coal in his stocking for Christmas.